Hey now it may have been flat where he was, but has your two-headed bro-in-law ever heard of
Granite Peak or
Lutsen or
Spirit Mountain or
Indianhead or the Legend, the Beast, the Mother of all Rad Mountains,
MOUNT BOHEMIA!!! ?
You know, he's right, you're not about to mistake northern Wisconsin for the Grand Tetons anytime soon, but it's better- trust me- than Kansas, and certainly better than what you'd expect in the midwest. Plus you get all the added off-season benefits of monstrous mosquitoes and blisteringly hot summers. On the minus side, though, the area is not being overrun by Californians.
I just have to work on my norgie-pine cone eater accent. Where's the Prairie Home Companion tapes???